My brother asked my Mom that question the other day when they were driving in my parents' non-air conditioned van in the blistering afternoon heat. It's an old family joke that our defrost and AC never seem to work when we need them to - frequently on the same day. Although AC would be nice some of these summer days, I appreciate the background info that contributes to a lack of all the comforts of life...
Last night I went to a BBQ that my former youth group put on. Despite feeling ridiculously old around all the young kids that are now the high school student leaders, I had a great conversation with the host of the party, "Uncle" Greg (I think the whole church calls him "Uncle Greg," regardless of age and their relationship to him - he's just one of those type people!). Uncle Greg and his sweet wife, Aunt Julie, have a son that just graduated high school, a son that is somewhere around 15, and a daughter about 12. This past year, an extended family member's daughter had her second (or maybe third?) child with the second (or maybe third?) father. Uncle Greg and Aunt Julie decided to adopt Brenna and raise her as their own.
At one point, Uncle Greg was kissing Brenna goodnight before Aunt Julie took her upstairs to tuck her into bed, and he was talking about the consistency of change and the importance of listening for God's direction in our lives. He mentioned how, when he and Julie started considering and praying about adopting Brenna, he didn't know if he'd have the energy to essentially start all over with childrearing at the age of 42; "But Dani," he said, with Brenna's head snuggled under his chin, tucked into his neck and resting on his chest, "This little girl didn't have a Daddy. Her father is a man about my age with 10 kids already, who doesn't want anything to do with her. I might not have all the energy I had with the older kids, but I can love her, and I can be her Daddy."
I had to blink back tears (yes, I know, emotional - sorry!). Uncle Greg and Aunt Julie have taken on the huge project - financially, emotionally, spiritually - of accepting a child into their life as THEIR little girl.
It made me think of the sacrifices that parents make, giving up time, energy, goals, ambitions, crazy adventures like running off to Egypt for a couple weeks, etc. For my parents, many of their sacrifices can be seen in the cars they drive: they have old, ugly, family-oriented vehicles because they prioritized time together and investing their money in things for their kids that were more than just physical toys. Those cars have been used to drive countless miles on family road trips all over the western half of the USA, they've carted family members, friends, and lots of food to different sporting events to cheer on one of the kids, they've transported Costco wholesale products, suitcases packed for foreign adventures, and all my earthly possessions when I've moved...
When I think of it in those kinds of terms, I like the fact that they don't have AC - just like I like the fact that Uncle Greg and Aunt Julie might not be partying it up like emptynesters in another 6 years when their own biological children are technically grown. Sometimes the best things in life have a few drawbacks along the way - like the way sweat trickles down your back when you ride in one of my parents' cars in July.
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